Thursday, December 13, 2012

Pamper Yourself

“The way you treat yourself, sets the standard for others.” -- Sonya Friedman

The holidays are here and many of us try to just survive in the craziness of the days. Even though we love the time we spend shopping, eating, and sharing time with our family and friends, everything could become a task more than a celebration.

Now is the best moment to stop and decide how you can be more PRESENT in the festivities so you can appreciate the value of those experiences at the same time that you accomplish everything that is required to do. One of the best things that I highly recommend is to make time for you, or what you can call “Me Time”.

Men and women alike, everyone can use a little stress reduction and visiting a Spa will definitely help you look and feel better. A Spa is a place to calm the mind, relax the body and enjoy life. Many spas offer beauty treatments for you nails, hair and skin care, including facials, peels and microdermabrasions. They also offer massage therapy, aromatherapy and scrubs that promote good health. Some even offer yoga classes that can easily be integrated with the treatments available. Many Spas offer seminars on healthy eating habits that will promote a healthy lifestyle. The International Spa Association (ISPA) best description on a spa is “places devoted to enhancing well-being through a variety of professional services that encourages the renewal of mind, body and spirit.”

If your body is recovering from illness, if it is sore from a stressful workout, or even feeling the stress from a busy lifestyle, a spa treatment will make you feel more relaxed. Many of the treatments, specially massage therapy, will help you relieve a variety of health conditions, including sleep disorders, depression, migraines, high blood pressure, and even cancer-related fatigue. It can also improve circulation, joint flexibility and promote healing after injury or surgery.

In addition to the physical benefits offered, massage therapy will also treat your spirit by applying pressure to energy points in the body. Two of the most popular spa treatments in massage therapy are Acupressure Massage and Ayurvedic Massage. Both of them are designed to heal the body by creating a balance between mind, body and spirit --- What a great combination!

Many Spas offer meditation, yoga and self-discovery retreats. On these retreats you will learn how to meditate and enjoy mindfulness while you integrate movements and exercises that will bring contentment, open your heart and create mental and emotional peace.

There are alternatives for every person and for every budget, of course. So today, my recommendation is to think of your “Me Time” and call your nearest Spa location, check the services they provide and make an appointment to “Pamper Yourself”. That’s one of the best ways for you to feel empowered to face the holidays with BALANCE and GRATITUDE. You will feel inner peace and will perform better not only mentally, but physically and spiritually as well. Enjoy and Happy Holidays!
By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Evelyn Torres is a Transformational Life Coach

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Beliefs - Reality or Illusion?

                                                    Photo courtesy of: TORRES GROUPE

A 'limiting belief' is defined as an invented idea that we believe is true.

Do you think that your are capable of changing your life? Well...I can assure you that transformational change is possible at anytime for everyone including you. All the ideas about who you are and what you think you can do or what you cannot do ---things like your childhood, your education, your job, your social life, your past, are part of who you are, but are not the things that define you as a human being. Many times we feel stuck with our way of thinking, the same old patterns of reacting to our external world but we are not aware that change should begin with a big intention and desire from our heart. 

Recently, I was reading an article from Marion Franklin where she quoted a story of an Unknown Author and the end of the story really caught my attention:

"There is only one person who is capable to set limits to your growth: it is YOU. YOU are the only person who can revolutionize your life. You are the only person who can influence your happiness, your realization, and your success. You are the only person who can help yourself.    

        Your life does not change when your boss changes, when your friends change, when your parents change, when your partner changes, when your company changes. Your life changes when YOU change, when you go beyond your limiting beliefs, when you realize that you are the only one responsible for your life. The most important relationship you can have is the one you have with yourself.”
------ Author Unknown

Many of our limiting beliefs are the barrier to our growth on all aspects of our lives. We create “invisible walls” around us that sometimes are worst than the walls constructed at jails to prevent people to escape. The sad thing is that many of us live our life thinking that those “invisible walls” are there to protect us from the world, when in reality what they are doing is preventing us to enjoy the world to the fullest. An example of this is how young kids can develop false associations very early on that help them to create self-limiting beliefs. You can notice how many people spend the first fifty years of their life getting over the first five. Those self-limiting beliefs take control of your power, which is there, but you cannot see it.

I believe that everyone has the ability to create amazing things in their own lives and in this world. But before we are able to create, we need to understand that all those beliefs that are holding us back are only an illusion that we have created. Once we understand that, the possibilities are endless.

You can read many “self-improvement books” looking for a way to make changes in your life and become a better person. That’s great, but those changes will not flourish in your life until you understand that any positive change is not on the pages of that book, but within you. You have the power in yourself to fulfill all your desires, but not until you have the courage to break all those “invisible walls” that are keeping you trapped inside your own perfect human being.

Today have the courage and make the commitment to question your beliefs and discover which ones are serving you to grow and which one are holding you back on your growth. You will be amazed to notice that many of those beliefs are not a reality, but just an illusion.
Be brave and start today!

Evelyn Torres is a Transformational Life Coach

Friday, October 5, 2012

A Mother's Breast Cancer

Cancer is so limited…It cannot cripple love. It cannot shatter hope. It cannot corrode faith. It cannot eat away peace. It cannot destroy confidence. It cannot kill friendship. It cannot shut out memories. It cannot silence courage. It cannot reduce eternal life. It cannot quench the Spirit.” ~Unknown (from Peaceful Mind Peaceful Life)

It seems like yesterday, but 17 years ago my mother lost her life because of this “monster” called breast cancer. At the time it was very devastating for her and for all the people around who cared so much for her. You know, my mother’s cancer was not any different from other people that go through the pain of this disease every day. What makes my mother’s cancer more devastating than other people’s suffering is that she never went to a doctor for her annual exams. The last time she visited a gynecologist was when my brother was born, and he was 37 years old when she died. My mother’s breast cancer was so metastasized when it was discovered that it was coming from the inside of her body to the outside destroying the skin of her breast. But above all this tragic and painful experience, what makes my mother’s death of breast cancer so devastating was that she was alive only 17 days from the day we learned of her diagnosis and the day she died.

We were not there for my mother during treatment, we were not there during recovery, we were not there enough time to comfort her, because when my mother’s cancer was discovered, it was already too late to save her. For many years there was not even one day when I hadn't thought of the suffering I lived with her during those 17 days after diagnosis. She was around us and we didn’t know; not because we didn’t care, but because she didn't know either. She was so scared to visit a doctor that she just closed her mind to the idea that annual checkups were necessary.

Now, after so many years I have been able to understand that devastation and suffering show up in our life and it is our mission to give a meaning to that suffering. I learned that it was up to me to learn from the errors that brought that suffering and apply changes to my own life.

After 1995 I have never missed my annual visit to my gynecologist and most important to my annual mammogram. I am very aware of the important role of preventive care. Programs for breast cancer awareness month from Susan G. Komen and the American Cancer Society have been on my list of annual donations. Participation on the walks and fundraising during the month of October have been on my calendar every single year.

There are no guarantees that my awareness of the preventive care will keep me cancer free. By any means that is not my message. My message after those 17 years is that even on the aftermath of suffering and sickness you can find a lesson of survival and improvement. For me it was that I will not close my eyes to the importance of prevention because I am scared or don’t want to know. If I have breast cancer “I want to know” as soon as possible so I can fight with all the force of my being.

October is BREAST CANCER AWARENESS MONTH and it is my message to every woman in this Planet Earth, PLEASE GET SCREENED. You deserve it and your family deserve the opportunity to be there with you.

Let’s all get PINK!!!!
By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Listen to Your Music NOW !!

“I need drama in my life to keep making music” -- Eminem

Many times we are waiting for the right moment to take action to improve our life. We expect for the Universe to provide us with the tools required to listen to our music..--”The right moment will come, the perfect conditions will show, the door is closed now, the problems in my life are too overwhelming right now.”  We wait, and we wait for the right moment to take action.... Rest assure that, if your decision is to wait for the perfect time, it will be a long, long wait for you.

The right moment is NOW because it is the only moment you have. Tomorrow is just a wish and action should not be a wish.  Action can only happens in the present moment or what Eckhart Tolle  calls “The NOW”. All the darkness that we see around is what is needed for us to take action into change. The Universe will not provide you with anything that you don’t need. Everything is in alignment with our state of being and growth. But, when we see that Divine Drama as an obstacle, the light that the Universe is offering us will not shine through.

Instead of asking “why me?”, “why this is happening to me?”, “why this sucks?”, we should begin to understand that the question should be “Why not me?” and the answer will be “This is why you”. Listen to the music and understand that your own natural wholeness is always there. Everything is already within us; it is just a matter of tuning to the right channel so we can understand the lyrics of the music we are receiving. If we are traveling on our car and the radio station is out of tune, it will be very hard to listen, but when we go and tune the station correctly...Voila! we get a new signal and we can understand perfectly. The same thing happens with our life; if we are not on the right tune, we cannot understand our Divine Drama.

On the correct tune you understand that THE UNIVERSE IS NOT CONSPIRING AGAINST YOU, BUT IT IS CONSPIRING FOR YOU. On that correct tune we do not need to wait for the perfect conditions to take action because even in the darkest moment we can listen to the music loud and clear. On that correct tune we can see that a larger version of us is trying to rebirth and this is the opportunity that is presented to us to emerge and take ACTION. We are on the right tune, with the right signal.

Recently, I heard an analogy that really inspired me to understand my music. “In the forest the seed plants itself in the dirt. That seed is not complaining “oh, that dirt is smelly, or dirty, or dark”. The seed does not plant itself on top of a rock and says “oh I got the clean path to my growth and I am now on top of this clean rock”... No, that seed plants itself in the darkness of the dirt so when the light comes everything that is needed as nourishment for growth will be provided and a new plant will emerge. Everything that was needed for that seed to grow was provided even in the darkness of the Earth”

Remember that it is just a matter of finding the right tune that is already there. As Lao Tzu teaches “Music in the soul can be heard by the universe.” Are You Ready to Listen to Your Music NOW?

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Sunday, September 9, 2012

What If you Play-to-Win?

In the game of life we play different games. Some games are fun, some games are scary, some could be challenging, but at the end of the day there is no escape to the different games that are on our path of life.

You may think, HOW IS MY LIFE A GAME?, HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO PLAY, when I have so many problems on my plate. Well, I can offer you this perspective to view all those situations that are present in your life.... You can think in this way: “My life is full of problems and I do not know how to begin to solve them” or you can think this way: “Every challenge in life is a game worth playing and I will find the best strategy to Play-to-Win?” I am sure that the positive view of the second alternative is clearly the one that will move you into action and fulfill your goals.

The problem is that in our culture we have been trained to think that our purpose in life is to work hard; then, if we have some time left, we should play and have fun. That’s not how we were created as human beings, and that is why the word “stress” is part of our daily vocabulary.

Studies show that we are moving from an Industrial Economy, where you complete tasks, work hard at your workplace to solve problems, to earn money to buy things and maybe save some money for retirement. Now we are having a shift in humanity and we are moving to an Inspiration Economy where we want to create possibilities, express our talents in ways that add value and inspiration to our life and to the life of others. We want to fulfill a purpose and at the same time get results. You can see this shift in the line of thinking at companies like Microsoft, Facebook and Apple...they do not have “workers”, they have “players” that integrate into their game. These companies promote strategies that inspire every person there and facilitate their creative minds; experiences that expand skills and inspire consciousness. While you play you will create wealth for yourself and others based on what you value.

We are living on an era of computers, Xbox, smartphones and apps. Everybody look forward to play some kind of game using technology; games are not only for kids, adults are playing as well.  We can adapt that “spirit of play” to our daily life if we know that the end result will be one that will promote joy and fulfillment. When you “Play-to-Win” you have purpose; you have the intention to give the best of of yourself with the vision of reaching your goal.

I don’t know about you, but to me this is a better way to live my life and find my purpose. We all have a choice in the way we confront our challenges. As Coach Dave Buck teaches “To wake up every day into an exciting game that is fun to play and fulfills your purpose; rather than a job that is a not winnable game that never ends; checking off tasks on a bottomless list!!!

Are you ready to PLAY-TO-WIN the Game of your Life?

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Friday, August 31, 2012

What do I want?

Today I was doing a guided meditation from the Chopra Center and the mantra was “What do I want?, What do I want?, What do I want?”

Many times when we ask people “What do you want?” the answer is happiness, joy, loving relationships, peace of mind. Our desires could be external, like material gains. They could be physical desires, like food, water, sex. Also we have internal desires, like emotional or spiritual-soul connections. We all could have different desires during our life on very different levels. They change as we evolve in our physical and spiritual life, and that’s perfectly fine. It is part of being human.

We may want a good job, a big house, more money. We wish to have a fit body, to enjoy good health. We want to connect more with our family and friends, be able to feel peace and enjoy life; these are different desires, and it is our birthright to ask the Universe and be opened to receive.

Deepak Chopra teaches that one thing is always the same for all of us; it is what he calls the heart desires: Attention, Affection, Acceptance and Appreciation. When we fulfill those desires of our heart, our life is centered which allows the flow of our needs on the physical, mental and spiritual level; we are centered in Love, which is what we are all about. “We are spiritual beings in physical bodies”, as Deepak teaches, and our center is Love. Our happiness comes only when we are centered in the heart and Love is the center of the heart.

So today when I was asking myself during my meditation “What do I Want?” I just centered myself in my Heart. I opened my heart to Love and imagined that Love was flowing from my body and covering the world. I asked the question “What do I Want?” and set my intention and my desires, without expectation, knowing that any intention that is coming from my heart centered with Love, will be fulfilled at the right time. I will be open to receive, not on my time, but at the time that the Universe feels that is my time.

Remember your heart desires: Attention, Affection, Acceptance and Appreciation. Also remember that this Love comes from the inside of your being to the outside world, not in reverse.The starting point is to fill your own heart with Love: Accept yourself, Appreciate yourself, bring Attention to yourself and give Affection to yourself. Then you will be able to give and receive.

Go to your heart and be opened to receive. When we open our heart to Love, the Universe will open for us and our question “What do I Want?” will be answered at the right moment.....It is up to us to be opened and listen when the Universe is giving us the answer. Namasté......

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

The Power of Persistence

“Our greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time we fall.” --Confucius

Persistence and motivation are two qualities that go hand in hand. In order for us to accomplish success in reaching our goals, it is necessary for us to have great motivation and be willing to persist on our route, even when we find bumps on the road.

I remember reading a quote from Sam Walton, one of the founders of Walmart --”it was an overnight success that was 20 years in the making.”* Nothing in life is an overnight success. Many times when we listen to a singer sensation, a famous actor or successful entrepreneur, we just notice the results -- FAME, MONEY- when in reality just a few people are able to accomplish great things in life without going through disappointments and failures. Many of those people that we consider “successful” have spent many years of rejection and pain, but never giving up.

The secret of PERSISTENCE is PERSISTENCE itself. If one thing does not work, learn the lesson, move on and try another way. Helen Keller once said -- “We can do anything we want to do if we stick with it long enough.”* We all know how this woman was able to overcome so many barriers in her life and became an example to humanity --- Persistence, Persistence, Persistence.

We start with a vision of an accomplishment we desire, then we set our goals in order to reach that vision, but if we do not have commitment to work hard to reach our goals, it will be almost impossible to be successful. Commitment to our vision will give us the power to move any obstacles that we may encounter on the road to accomplish our goal. The degree of commitment that we might have will be consistent with our motivation. The more motivated you are to reach your goal, the more committed you will be to whatever needs to be done in order to obtain success.

There is NO MAGIC to success. From learning to bake a cake to establish and run a business, be willing to accept the lessons of the disappointments, fall to the floor, stand up, learn, learn again and then try in a different way. No guarantees on how many times you have to try before you enjoy success, but if you are committed to reach your goal, I can guarantee one thing, that the length of time will not be important because you will be living your dream even when you are still trying. Learn to enjoy the ride before you reach your destination and you will find many surprises --- that’s a guarantee!!

Never give up...  ---- the Power of Persistence....

*Quotes from the book:
  Life Coaching Activities & Powerful Questions by Phyllis Reardon

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Monday, August 27, 2012

Self-Esteem and Happiness

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent” - Eleanor Roosevelt

The way we see ourselves is a key factor to our success on the accomplishments of our goals. High self-esteem is a very important quality for developing happiness, fulfillment, rich relationships, and overall success in life.

Many of us confuse having high self-esteem with ego. This is a misconception of this quality so important in our development. A person that lives on a self-centered mode or what we call ego, obsessed with themselves and usually obtain their fulfillment at the expense of others; usually people that are self-centered do not possess high self-esteem. They always feel that they are not enough, a void in their heart that will not allow them to reach any success or fulfillment unless they sabotage the happiness of others.

On the other hand, high self-esteem means being competent and capable to share our blessings at the same time that we can appreciate and honor the blessings of others. This acceptance brings joy, good relationships, love, fulfillment, and all the positive qualities that we attract when we are living our lives understanding that we are unique and that others around us are as unique in their own way as we are. This possibility of living our life is priceless.  

Negative self talk many times becomes part of our personality because we think that this is what will protect us from the world that we perceive as harmful to us. We do not feel competent or lovable enough to obtain what we want to receive and that self-sabotage talk is the excuse that we develop to explain our lack of success of our goals or our lack of positive relationships. Those excuses are the signal for us that we are living in fear, anger or any dysfunctional state that is in the way of our success.  We adopt the talk of self-pity, a dysfunctional talk from a victim perspective. I compare this negative self-sabotage talk to the mean girls that we all witnessed when we were in high school. We bully ourselves… and from my stand point of view, that is not a very healthy way to live.

So the question is “how can I elevate my self-esteem? The most important step will be to develop awareness to the self-sabotage talk that you might have every single day.

Practice every day these principles in your life. Make them part of your daily routine:

  1. Validate yourself --- not only on your accomplishments, but on also on your failures.
  2. Learn from your experiences and enjoy every opportunity to learn.
  3. Have gratitude for the blessings in life. Gratitude is key to appreciate and to love.
  4. Accept that the world is an endless source of abundance if you believe in yourself.
  5. Expect success, happiness, good relationships in your life; be open to receive.
  6. Commit yourself to your goals with a vision of success without being attached to any result.
  7. Empower yourself to win without diminishing others.
  8. Forgive yourself for any error that you made in the past and use the experience to grow.
  9. Learn empathy for your flaws and imperfections; that is what makes you human.
  10. Be patient with yourself.
Louis Hay, a person that I greatly admire, recently mentioned on a seminar I attended that her daily practice every morning, after brushing her teeth, was to look herself in the mirror and say to the image in the mirror - “You are SPECIAL, you are UNIQUE, you are LOVABLE, you are SMART… and I LOVE YOU”.  What a great time to work on your self-esteem... no makeup, no beautiful clothes, no jewelry, just the beautiful inside of you, the really you... I think that this is a great practice. Remember, practice makes perfection and we all are a work in progress.

You have to reach the point where you understand that you are not perfect, nobody is…..

Let’s work to elevate that self-esteem in order to obtain transformation in our lives! Be the best you can be because you are worth it!!!

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Looking for the Big Picture....

Are you so focused on the details that you cannot see the BIG PICTURE in your life?

Remember a time when you went to your favorite art gallery and you saw a painting and you could not understand the message from the artist. Then you noticed that you were too close to the painting trying to interpret pieces of the painting, so you decided to move farther and look at it from a different perspective. Then, like magic, you were able to understand the message of the artist on that piece of art. You saw the big picture…

The same thing happens to us in our lives. Sometimes we are so focused on the details that we get overwhelmed with those details. This takes us to a point where we cannot find any solutions to our questions or find a path to follow.  Too many pieces, too many questions…. No answers…

Many times when we are only looking at the details, we land in the territory of fear, because we do not have clarity on our thoughts; doubts of our potential takes the place that should be filled with wisdom. That is the moment when we have to stop, center and take a step back. By looking at the big picture of the situation we are trying to solve we are capable of finding more solutions align with our purpose and our vision.

Give it a try:
The next time you have a situation in your life where too many things need to be solved… STOP, center your awareness, maybe set some time for meditation (even 10 minutes will help) and then from that point you will be able to make better decisions. Get a different view from another angle and you will see how you will be able to see from a different perspective.

Do not miss the message by just concentrating on the details. See the BIG PICTURE!!!

By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom

Saturday, August 25, 2012

Think in "Shades of Gray"

Everybody set goals in their lives. We want a better job, we want a new home, we want to improve our health, we want to improve our finances; different people, different goals. But, what happened after we set our goal and it is not accomplished in the time frame that we set in our mind? Usually, we get frustrated and then we don’t continue trying to fulfill that goal.

We think in black and white (success or failure), and that is what is holding us back in reaching our goals. When we are able to rethink our goal and notice where we fail in order to get there, then we can adjust our path to the goal (shades of gray). By admitting our errors and making adjustments on the process to get what we want without looking at this adjustment as a failure, but an opportunity to learn and improve, we will be able to say that we are applying in our lives “Shades of Gray”. Recalculate your strategic process until you reach your goal. Remember, our time is not always the time of the Universe, so don’t be discouraged, and change the way you look at success and failure, by applying the colors between black and white to your life.

Try it this week, and you will be amazed on the changes you will see in your vision and the accomplishment of your goal ------ Think in “Shades of Gray”
By:  Evelyn Torres for AwarenessWisdom